this is La Paz at night' bonita no?

I look around....yes this is poverty. These homes, these people, this pain. It hurts me and embarrasses me that I have come here to help and can´t solve all their problems. But hey, if I had that power then we can´t sit back and watch God use us. I visited a woman yesterday who managed to get around crawling on her hands and knees. See her diet is horrible, potatoes and well, potatoes. Her bones have suffered from the loss of calcium and has led to complications of osteoporosis mixed with arthritis. On top of this debilidad she has a mental handicap that has come with age. In her dirt floored, mud walled, dangerously tittering on a side of a cliff home she birthed her 13 children. Only two have stayed to take care of her, one pregnant without a husband the other only 9 years old. How do they manage? They can´t afford milk. She needs tests to prove to the government that she indeed has a handicap and qualifies for the help they offer. But the family can´t pay. Well we aren´t here for our entertainment-- to just listen to her story, nod, smile, give her a hug. Irene (a very kind hearted, sympathetic woman I work with) has arranged for us to raise the money through raffling off goody boxes of necessities. I pray that we reach the amount needed. If we help at least one family, I feel like our visits to the poorer areas aren´t a waste.

There are alot of broken families here. Barely any have both parents, for one reason or another. I visited one family who had 6 children, three of them were her own, the other were her sister´s who recently passed away from cancer. She took them as her own and has shown no favoritism. They are happy, well behaved, dirty, runny nosed children. One of the four year old boys cracked me up today. We were looking at where Salud Integral was helping build a larger house (larger than the one room living condition they have). This little one, named Diego, was climbing up one of the dirt walls. I said ''Cuidado''. He looks at me with his rosy cheeks and gorro almost over his smiling eyes , and says--''soy macho!'' and continues on. This is a boy who runs down ladders, sleeps on the same mattress as his 5 other siblings, just lost his mom to cancer, and has no dad. They raise them tough here. I let him prove his macho-ness, then swooped him up, hugged him and kissed him.

I am not telling these stories to depress you. I am revealing a little of what I see everyday. A little bit of how a large portion of the world lives. We are blessed. If you leave this site with anything, I pray that it is either the gratitude of what you are blessed with, or the knowledge of how others live. Or both...that would be great too.

Last weekend I went to Tiwanaku, one of the pueblos nearby with old ruins from before Machu Picchu. The sad thing is, its such a poor country they don´t have money to un-earth the to

wn that lay just below our feet. It was beautiful and frustrating at the same time. Beautiful at the history and beliefs they have. One was that they would tie fabric around their head from birth and tighten it, while re'enforcing it with rocks. Why? you may ask. Well two theories. One, to

appear more intelligent with a taller head! And the other, apparently the taller the head the higher the social status. I think I´ll stick with who has a nicer car...

It´s frustrating because there is so much historia lost beneath, just waiting to be told. Just walking along an area, we found bones scattered about, volcanic stones, and handcrafted ceramic pots so delicately painted (no we weren´t allowed there). But it was beautiful and exciting to see.

I´ll end with a question one of the kids asked me. ''¿Por que dios ha hecho personas de diferente colores?'' I was going to go into great detail about the necessity of different skin tones, about depending on where you lived and all that...but instead I asked him why he thought God made people with different skin colors. He said, ''El dios le gustan cosas interesante.'' God does like interesting things. I liked his answer.

And here we go

This is illimani...the highest mountian in Bolivia. Was once an active volcanoe, people fear that it may one day become active again because of the movement of lava below. Who knows. But for now it is a silent beast tipped with snow, towering over La Paz.

"Ven Yesi, ven!" says Rita. Its on of the dentists that I get to shadow (I saw some tooth extractions today...man those kids are tough, with black rotting teeth and all). She´s a bad influence, she´s stealing me away from the clininc to watch an entrada in El Alto. No I didn´t know where El Alto was or any idea what an entrada was...but when in Rome...I mean Bolivia! Turns out it was the largest desfile (parade) I´ve ever seen. And man those outfits were crazy! Rita lives 5 stories high--it over looked the entire Entrada. Never in my life have I seen so many people-all happy, dancing, eating, drinking. It was the celetion of their independence of La Paz. I ate alot and to end the night was in a parade for Salude Integral! (We got there late...but of course on time in Bolivian time). And yes-I forgot my camera...oops.

Javier and I have been doing home visits to the elderly who havn´t been able to make it to the weekly meetings. This I love. One because I like elderly, they have so much to teach me. Two they are precious when they speak aymari, and three it is humbling to see how they live. The higher we go the harder life seems. No roads, ladders leading up to a doowary, no water, no bathroom, no electricity. But they manage to serve me a refresco when I enter their humble aboad, Who decided it a good idea to build homes on such trecherous, steep, inclinces? Some of those that we are visiting are in bad shape. There is nothing I can do for a cancerous woman with hepatitis, unable to move and too poor to pay for any type of surgery of treatment. She is babbling off to me in a mix of aymari and spanish as she explains to me what hurts through her tear filled, yellow glazed eyes--she´s real sick. My heart hurts for people like her, for the weak, for the forgotten, for the poor, for the hurting. Yeah I am here to help--but honestly can I change their circumstance? A warm embrace, a smile, a cup of tea will only provide temporary comfort. They need so much more...

After our visit we were already half up a mountain where no plants grew and no roads guided you. Javi says, why not? So we kept going up. Up, up, up we go until all I hear is the wind blowing the grass and the finches diving into the trecherous cliffs that boarderd our camino. Its amazing at the top. You see this bowl below, filled with cars, buildings, homes, people all running about--each with their own goals and responsibilities. That is La Paz. A silent business that fills this bowl. I am awestruct of the beauty that lies just beyond the mountains...amazing how true the saying is "once you master one mountain--you are confronted with so many more." (could be a saying...or I am just that whitty...regardless you can quote me on it!).

I am learning alot from Dr Omar. For some reason or other--one I am not going to question--he has taken me under his wing. He wants me to learn and experience all that I can. In exchange I help him with his English. It works. Don´t you love the barter system?

Today is Dia del Amistad. It´s great. Its like Valentines day--but better. You don´t have to have a lover--its a day to appreciate those close to you, the ones you trust, and friendship in general. Well in celebration of this day--I love all you guys. I appreciate every friendship I have and am so blessed with such loving, giving, thoughtful and entertaining people in my life. Happy Friendship Day.

Here are the two lovely people I live with. So kind, full of life and hilarious. Anitawa has the green hoody on and Janet is the other. Definitely different than I thought they would be...a good different, they are awesome.

The Three Clinics

I came here with a open mind, an empty wallet, and a heart full of desire to serve, to help, to make a change. I came here with absolutely no clue what to expect. Thank God, that He knows what He's doing in my life...to end up in a freezing country that has over 15 dialects, main one being spanish. But I am here now, and loving it. The nuns are crazy and free spirited, I thought I would change them--but no, they are teaching me.

La Merced:

This is where I live with the nuns. They built this home on their own--it is a home and a clinic in one. They offer a dentist, a medical clinic, lunch program, meeting rooms, and a program for the elderly. I will be working here with the adultos mayores (elderly) hanging out, doing activities, making bread, art, and learning how to stitch. I also will be doing some physical therapy with them...yes I know-- I don't know what I am doing. But the jist is, they need to stretch and get some exercise, I think I can handle that. I am working with Javier, a sweet guy who is a Christian--not Catholic (shhhh don't tell the nuns). I am kidding, they know, and they laugh about it. I love it, it is a yellow house with plenty of space. It rest just above the periferico (the main road the follows the rim of the bowl that La Paz makes). So mainly, I have the best view of La Paz, its lights of the town twinkle up and remind me of stars looking up at me. Well this picture is during the day-but imagine the beauty when it all lights up at night. When I met the adultos mayores it was bout 30 of them in a small room, some on the floor, some making bread, and some knitting away. When I introduced myself I recieved an applause...actually anytime I did anything I got an applause. Quite entertaining. They were recieving glasses that day from the clinic. In reality this gathering is a way to get the elderly out of the house and in a social setting. Its great for them...and I get to hear them chatter away in their indiginous languages as they laugh and wink at me. Man I wish I knew what they were saying!

Vente-siete de Mayo:

This would be clinic number 2, and yes they named it after a date, they name lots of things after dates here. This one is more like a daycare. They have one level that teaches children, from 2-7 years old. When I went into the toddlers room I was greated by 23 runny nosed, dirty face, happy waving children. All with their hands open making a five as they all repeat hola in their sweet little voices. I adore children, they are precious. But apparantly these precious little children carry a dangerious hepatisis A. Hence the day of disinfecting of the entire clinic, which of course turned into 3 days since it was such a job, but it got done. The next floor is a medical clinic and a dentist where I will be switching back and forth working with these two doctors. They both are so willing to teach me and allow me to help. The one doctor even let me take a patient, while he sat back and waited for a diagnosis...it was a cold, ha. Lastly this clinic also offers meals for those that sign up for the program, this is to help with the malnutrition in this area.

Casa Esperanza:

This third clinic is the most interesting, but also requires the most patience. It is a home and a rehabilitation center for children with disabilities, autism, downs syndrome, or other mental handicaps. Each child has he's personal teacher, who guides him and pushes him to higher development. Also, there is a project in the making for a lunch program here as well. This program will socialize the children with disabilities and educated others that come without a disability. It's a beautiful thing they are doing there, I hope that I will be able to help it develope.

Now alittle about me...

I have been given so many opportunites for adventures and have only been here one week! Wow, how time passes. I was able to stay in Cochabamba for a weekend, with an interesting woman. She was an activist for human rights who was kicked out of a couple of countries and visited over 110. She has amazing stories and has lived such a full life. I stayed with her as sister Janet traveled around and visited other nuns. This woman, was very hospitable, opening up her beautiful home to me that resided in the country. I was given the loft, which had walls of glass...so it was like sleeping in a tree house- but inside. Cochabamba is warmer, alot warmer than La Paz! I went for a hike up to their Jesus Cristo...kinda like Brazil's. Only this one is the largest, oh Bolivia, added 3 centimiters to this tower so they could say they had the largest!

It rests on a mountian that overlooks Cochabamba and you can even go up into the arms. It's a beautiful overlook of the entire city. George Ann (whose house I was staying at) hooked me up with some people my age. They took me out on the town and even to an outside rock/reggae concert. Oh I moshed...and I danced! It was a great trip.

Tomorrow we are having a parade because it is a holiday for them here. Anitawa convinced me to participate. I will do the site seeing/touristy thing this weekend with one of the doctors I work with. We have two argentinians staying with us here at La Merced...both vegans...its different to cook with them. But I am learning to be open minded ;-).

It is funny how Bolivians are. They live a life different then I ever have seen. They are set in their ways and are proud of it. They live a hard life and don't complain about it. They have never won a war they entered, but still have this stubborn pride that shines through. A good way to explain it is they filler words "No ve?" They'll say something and then add in "don't you see" and continue on. Maybe it is to ensure you are listening or maybe it is because they want you to see life and view the world like they do. They are happy and non-materialistic. They take a two hour lunch in the middle of the day to relax. And they have so many holidays. Why is it that America has so few? During my two month stay I will experience 4 national holidays. Maybe this is why they seem more relaxed, on their own pace, and enjoy life and its beauty. No ve?

This is from my rooftop where I do yoga in the afternoon and hand-wash my clothes

Now safely in La Paz, 12,000 ft high

Anitawa picked me up from the airport greeting me with a kiss and a steaming hot cup of cocoa tea--yes fresh from a thermis. She said it helps with the altitude. She also brought along a family who´s youngest shyly handed me a rose. Now Anitawa was not your typical nun...she was a monja chula. She proceeded to fly down the curviest roads in a bulky white jeep named Verita. My home is beautiful and hudge! There was a basket of daisies waiting for me on my bed--I love daisies!!! I have electricity but no heat. My own bathroom too!

6:30 Am I wake up with alittle difficulty breathing due to the thin air that so easily dries me out. But I am completely distracted as I look out my window to the most breathtaking sunrise that I have ever seen! I am surrounded by the highest, sharpest, most intriguing mountains that are backdropped by an artistic display of pink, orange, and purple tones.

Janet and Anitawa made me rest this first day--meaning no work. But I did get to explore downtown. Their bus system is one thing on my list to figure out--soon hopefully. They are crazy minivans with the sliding door open and a young kid yelling out where it is headed as it barrels towards you. Oh and those cross walks! Well Bolivia had a problem with the cars not stopping...so they thought it smart to dress up someone like a zebra and dance back and forth with a sign reading PARE, stop. HILARIOUS. But hey whatever works.

I visited my first clinic today...there are three that Anitawa started. They slapped on a white lab coat and called me the nurse...and sometimes medica. What did I get myself into? I was brought into a room full of health employees, teachers, doctors, and other employees of Salud Integral and introduced by Anitawa as the volunteer Amercan nurse. Then left in my own defense to "say a few words of my own". Oh man was I caught at a blank. But I think I fumbled through a short, slightly embarrassed introduction. Maybe in Bolivia second impressions mean more?

I already love Janet and Anitawa. Two amazing people, very loving, motherly, and hilarious. We plan to travel to Cochibamba this weekend to see more of Bolivia, as they say para aprovechar mi tiempo.

Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers as I struggle to adjust and feel confident...and hopefully with that the comfort of peace and knowledge...mainly not feeling lost! Lastly--what about those Spaniards??? Felicidades Espana! (pictures will be posted soon...some computer issues, meaning mine won't turn on!)